I've suffered with panic disorder for half my life now. A panic attack is, in my opinion, the absolute worst feeling in the world and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. It is a personal HELL. For those of you who have experienced one, you are probably nodding in agreement. For those of you who haven't, you probably will never understand how bad it is but thank you for reading this so you may gain a little understanding for someone who may be ill in your life.
A panic attack is not extreme nervousness or stress. It is a physical reaction that is triggered in your brain which is referred to as 'fight or flight'. The same thing that would happen to your body if you were being chased by a huge bear....racing heart, extreme fear, etc. is what a panic attack is. Except with a panic attack, there is no do or die situation happening. Mostly, you don't even know why this is happening. Sometimes you can identify the triggers but, a lot of times, if not all the time, they seem to come out of nowhere. Panic disorder is classified as the constant fear of the attacks and having them repeatedly. Panic disorder is also diagnosed when your life becomes unmanageable due to the disease. This is usually when people seek help. Therapy with a professional plus a strong desire to get well and do the work required is the key to managing this disease.
It has been a long road for me and this is what I've learned that may help you, things I wish I knew in the beginning.
1. Accept it. If you are suffering from panic disorder, it is probably not going to ever "go away". It may seem like devastating news that you don't want to hear but, there is an upside. It is 100% manageable. As you learn to cope, the panic attacks aren't as frequent and are usually less intense (and even when they are intense, your coping skills will help you to diminish it quicker).
2. You are okay. You cannot die from the actual panic attack. (with the exception of suicide, and if you feel suicidal, seek help immediately) It just FEELS like you are dying. In the midst of a panic attack, it feels like it will never go away, never get better but, it DOES and it WILL.
3. Stop fighting it. Stop avoiding situations that you believe causes it. Stop wishing it to go away. The more you give in to and accommodate the fear, the stronger it gets. If you feel the fear, accept it and proceed with your normal activities, the fear will start to shrink and eventually the things you thought you couldn't do because of the disease become non-issues.
4. Don't be ashamed. No one can tell you are having a panic attack, even though it feels like everyone knows that you are panicking. Usually they cannot tell. If you are in public, don't feel self conscious. If you are overwhelmed, there is nothing wrong with removing yourself from the situation if you are not at a level where you can calm yourself.
5. Learn to self soothe. An attack is very scary. It is natural to try and make it go away at all costs, including relying on other people to be your 'safety'. Don't rearrange your life to accommodate your disease and don't make someone responsible for making you feel better. It is great and necessary to have support and understanding but you shouldn't rely on them for your own well being. This is something you have to learn to live and cope with. You have to know that you are okay, no matter what.
6. Don't put up with ignorance. Accept the fact that some people will not understand. And that's okay. Find support through a support group of people or an individual who also suffer from panic.
7. Don't self medicate. If you are taking any drugs (including alcohol) to cope with your disease that has not been discussed or approved with a mental health professional, this is doing more harm than good. Alcohol, for example, is a depressant which causes more harm (such as reducing the effects of anti-depressants) than it's worth. Long term relief is what you should seek, not temporary relief.
8. See a mental health professional, rather than your GP, if you are thinking anti-depressants may help you. Just taking anti-depressants without being monitored by a therapist, is just putting off what the inevitable --you will have to face the disease and learn coping mechanisms, eventually. Anti-depressants aren't intended to be long term (although in some cases, they are). You should have therapy coupled with medication (if needed) to learn coping techniques. Your therapist can determine the length of medicinal treatment.
9. Stop beating yourself up for not being 'strong' or 'normal' or whatever mean things you tell yourself about your disease. If you had cancer, you wouldn't blame yourself. You would treat the illness in every way possible to get well. You wouldn't tell yourself to 'get a grip' or 'get over it'. You wouldn't tell yourself that you don't need medicine or help and just try to will it away. Get treatment.
10. Be okay with being uncomfortable. Learning to cope and doing the work it takes is sometimes daunting and exhausting. It's worth it. Be willing to be uncomfortable for a while to have a lifetime of relief.
Trust me, if I can learn to deal, anyone can. It gets better with time and you are capable of much more than your mind can even begin to imagine. Good vibes.
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