Bravery

When I drop off my little one at school in the morning, I am reminded that if she can be brave, so can I. 
This is her first year of school.  She's a very shy kid who doesn't feel completely comfortable around people.  She would just rather stay home than face a day of learning and being uncomfortable around people. 
Much like how I feel with my anxiety/depression is high. 

She doesn't cry to be dropped off anymore.  She knows that she has responsibilities and takes care of them.  She puts her school bag on in the car line and gives me two hugs every morning.  It's because she has gone to school all year and knows what to expect and what is expected of her.  She learned the days of the week so she can count down when she gets to stay home for the weekend. She knows that after lunch and nap, it's almost time to come home and that gets her through the day. Sometimes it's too overwhelming for her and she cries for me in the bathroom.  But then she pulls herself together and finishes her day.  She has gained confidence in herself that her track record of getting through bad days is 100%.

 So, every morning, I watch this beautifully strong girl walk to school by herself with her head held high when I know that it's not always easy for her.  I'm very blessed to have this brave little girl in my life to remind me of how brave I can be as well.  I now know that when my anxiety and/or depression is overwhelming me, I have a 100% track record of living through it. My life isn't much different from my little one.  I don't always feel like doing what needs to be done but, I remind myself that I'm capable and have the capacity to be brave when my head and life is filled with doubt and fear.  I just focus on the daily tasks at hand while silently counting down the day when I get to go home.

I've also learned that bravery isn't the absence of fear.  Bravery is the ability to feel fear and proceed anyway.  An ability that can be obtained through constant practice.